*H. Scott Prosterman writes:

“There are no words – “ I was surprised to see one of the smartest people I know wistfully post this yesterday. And he’s a good attorney, who’s sent me to the dictionary a time or two. But these days when the t-Rumpian nightmares come so fast and furiously, and sends the news cycle into a fast-spin cycle, it’s easy to get dizzy and lose one’s rhetorical way. He was referring to t-Rump pardoning Roger Stone for the seven felonies to which he plead guilty and had been sentenced. Yeah, that’s a tough one to “wrap your head around”. Those are words I don’t quite get. I know how to wrap a towel or bandana around my head, but haven’t figured out how to wrap my head around anything. “There are no words” to explain that. OK, so now the phrase has some context.

Back to Roger Stone, the cartoonish character open to unflattering comparisons of The Joker, The Riddler and the plutocrat caricature in Monopoly. Wait, I left out Richard Nixon – when Stone flashed Nixon’s patented “V” sign during his trial, it got really creepy, as in Nixon creepy. So – who remembers that Nixon actually named his re-election campaign, “CREEP – the Committee to Re-Elect the President?!?!” I’m so old I remember that, and bought all the first editions of the post-Watergate books.

That means I also remember how a bunch of Nixon’s cronies went to jail for breaking into the Democratic HQ at The Watergate office-retail-apartment complex in DC, and he let them go to jail. Ah, those were the days my friend. Herein lies the difference between Nixon and t-Rump. Nixon was an unethical political monster who used coded racism to get himself elected in 1972, prolonged the war in Vietnam, and utterly defamed and slandered his first opponent for the US Senate, Rep. Helen Gagahan Douglas (D-CA). She was a former Broadway actress and opera singer, a truly great woman, and not just because she gave him the name “Tricky Dick”. Ms Douglas served three admirable and effective terms (1945-51) in the House representing part of Los Angeles. She was among the first to have an integrated congressional staff, and promoted all the good environmental, education, racial-equality and accountable government causes. Most important, she stood up poll taxes, Jim Crow and to HUAAC [House Un-American Activities Committee]! Sadly, that was her undoing, as Nixon tarred her as a “communist sympathiser”, and “pink down to her underwear”. 

But I digress. When Stone flashed the Nixon “V” sign on the courthouse steps, it gave Americans of a certain age a really CREEPY feeling. Like, “Eeeewww, don’t I remember that?” Though Nixon’s respect for the rule of law was conveniently and inconsistently applied, he did not try to interfere with politically charged pardons when his good soldiers went to jail for their Watergate crimes.

Now comes t-Rump and his 11th pardon of a political ally since taking office. This is the most brazen and offensive example of self-dealing in American history. Stone went to jail for lying to Congress about protecting the man who pardoned him. Try wrapping your head around that, or anything. It’s become a regular Friday Fright Night News Dump, in which t-Rump makes a dramatic and shocking announcement to put a cherry on top of the poo-poo sundae he’s created throughout the week, with various assaults on the constitution, common sense and the rule of law. (I swear, the guy drives me to run on sentences and mixed metaphors.) One is hard pressed to think of anything t-Rump has done or said in the past four years that is not utterly stupid and destructive.

For all his awfulness, Nixon gave America a series of great, lasting gifts, while t-Rump has done his best to destroy whatever Reagan and Bush Jr left standing. This includes EPA [Environmental Protection Agency], OSHA [Occupational Safety and Health Act], expanded Food Stamps and Medicare, Clean Air and Water Acts, Marine Mammal Protection Act, Title IX and lowering the voting age to 18.

t-Rump, by contrast has done everything possible to destroy all of the above, and suppress voting among all people outside his favourite demographic, dumb white people who were never satisfied with the results of the Civil War. But wait there’s more! t-Rump’s leadership has also revealed a shocking ambiguity among some Americans about the results of World War II; the one where we allied with Western Europe to defeat Hitler and fascism. He is doing his best to undo the safeguards against global fascism, which were erected in the aftermath of World War II. The Republican Party has done everything possible to enable just that, under his leadership. I’m so old (here we go again) that I remember when Republicans prided themselves on virulent anti-communism, like that Nixon guy.

If you get so frustrated that you find yourself uttering wistfully, “There are no words…,” then come to Uncle Scott’s Fast & Furious Editorial & Thesaurus Service. I’ll help you turn just the right phrase to give your soul repose from the great disturbance, and place the latest outrage in the proper context. “Fast & Furious?” *I type about 100 wpm or more when I get mad, and that happens a lot these days.

*H. Scott Prosterman is a writer and communications consultant based in Oakland-Berkeley, and has published a variety of commentary and humour.